Hoe Cake Kwame Brown Heads to Motown | Wizards Blog Truth About It.net

Hoe Cake Kwame Brown Heads to Motown

Updated: July 29, 2008

Wow, Joe Dumars is a desperado……can the signing of Kwame Brown be seen as anything other than an act of desperation?

Hoe Cake Kwame Brown Heads to Motowncake via flickr/panduh, mugshot via wizznutzz, although this pic found by Jake on BF is much better

The Pistons have been tied to several potential blockbuster moves this summer, whether it be for Carmelo Anthony, Josh Smith, Tracy McGrady or Ron Artest. [side note: The 17th pick of the ’04 NBA draft which was shipped from Detroit, via Milwaukee and Denver, to Atlanta in the Rasheed Wallace trade was used by the Hawks to select Josh Smith.] But nothing has come to fruition since Joe Dumars built “big splash” expectations by deeming everyone available (with perhaps Jason Maxiell and Rodney Stuckey as the lone exceptions).

So now, after being on the latter end of “win or go home” in the Eastern Conference Finals for the past three years, this is Joe D’s answer. A guy in Kwame Brown who once, at the age of 24, destroyed a stranger’s cake, getting it all over the man, before ducking into a limo like a hoe, has been anointed to push the Detroit Pistons over the top.

Good luck with that one Motor City. Will Kwame finally find his way under consummate vet, Antonio McDyess? Or will his attitude travel the path of Rasheed Wallace? How will any of these guys affect Walter Sharpe? In any case, $8 million over two-years is not exactly a low-risk move.

One might say that only time will tell. One could also wonder what the Pistons could have done with $4 million per instead. Furthermore, one can vote on if they think Kwame will be a success in Detroit (like other former Wizards) or not.

I already know the answer. Being a Wizards fan, I’ve seen more than enough to judge Kwame Brown as someone whose bad attitude is beyond making him a serviceable NBA player. It starts with the guy faking a stomach ache during the playoffs and ends with him sucking.

What I can’t stomach is how the guy made it through the vetting process to get drafted first overall in the first place. Kwame Brown has tiny (and stone) hands!! What NBA big man has ever made it with some toy, bitch-ass hands?

According to Wikipedia, Detroit’s motto is “We Hope For Better Things; It Shall Rise From the Ashes”….. such hope for Tiny Hands Kwame would even be too audacious for Barack Obama…..too bad it’s the Pistons who will be getting burned.

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Kyle Weidie
Founder / Editor / Reporter / Writer at TAI
Kyle founded TAI in 2007 and has been weaving in and out the world of Wizards ever since, ducking WittmanFaces, jumping over G-Wiz, and avoiding stints on the DNP-Conditioning list. He has covered the Washington pro basketball team as a member of the media since 2009. Kyle lives in D.C. with his wife, loves basketball, and has no pets.