A Simple Solution For Mike Miller and His LeBron Shoes | Truth About It.net

A Simple Solution For Mike Miller and His LeBron Shoes

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Updated: October 14, 2009



Mike Miller is keeping his LeBrons

Okay Mike, I get it and it’s cool with me. Although I may think what I think about LeBron James, I’ve got no beef with you.  LeBron’s shoes are your most favoritest in the whole wide world … and you are BFF with the guy who chose to have a tattoo artist ink ‘Chosen 1′ on his back.

I’m not sure who LeBron thinks actually “chose” him to be whatever it is that he thinks he is (maybe Sports Illustrated is god to him — whatever the case, it’s kind of arrogant).

On a side, but related note: It’s funny … when an athlete is good and some sort of athletic freak-of-nature, he is said to have “god-given talent” (aka chosen). But when someone is born with a disability, it’s called a “being tested.” Oh well and whatever, I’m digressing way beyond my worldly means of comprehension.

The point is, Mike, you named your son after LeBron James’ friend and now you want to keep wearing his shoes. They are light and no other shoe will ever, ever hold you with the same embrace. You say you’ll wear them until they hurt you. Basically, LeBron’s shoes are like a girl you’re seriously dating (but not necessarily one who’s achieved ‘girlfriend’ status … yet).

But here’s the problem, this girl you’re dating (or what the shoes represent: LBJ and the team he plays for, the Cleveland Cavaliers), has had “issues” … not only with at least one of your current teammates/friends, but she has left bridges burning all over the city in which you live/play.

You don’t know if you’ll be teammates with these guys or live in the city forever. But you do know that the girl treats you right and it could get serious (as ‘man-crushes’ usually are heading in that direction).

Mike, you’re caught between two rocks of uncertainly and you can’t really push on either lest they roll back and crush you. You want to get along with your new teammates; the better the team unity, the better the chance of winning. But LeBron will also be a billionaire one day. That’s his ultimate goal. So it doesn’t behoove you to disparage the guy who “sonned” you [via Free Darko].

What to do, what to do? Caron Butler and DeShawn Stevenson can be intimidating guys. But so can LeBron.

The simple solution? A marker and some stickers.

You can continue to express loyalty to LeBron and his comfy shoes while saving face with your teammates by letting him know who you play for.

Easy as that.



2 Comments

  1. Matt Kremnitzer

    October 15, 2009 at 7:37 am

    Well done.

  2. Will

    October 15, 2009 at 10:15 am

    Hilarious, will link.

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